This evening I took advantage of one of training’s biggest perks: access to an empty studio.
An empty studio means that instead of orally rehearsing my dialogue while strolling the streets of Manhattan, I have the opportunity to try my hand at verbal instruction in a designated space, with real-life students, aka fellow teacher trainees, following my voice. (There is also a much lower chance of being mistaken for a crazy person.)
The catch is that the studio is only available when it’s not being used for a scheduled class, which at night isn’t the case until 9 p.m. I originally thought this was impossibly late–I’ve been so tired lately that if I had my way I’d be heading toward bed by 9 on most nights. But in truth I almost never get to sleep before 11, so I decided I might as well start making nighttime yoga part of my routine.
Tonight I helped the closing instructor clean the space (including the bathroom, whoa!) and was rewarded with the privilege of lingering for private practice. Another trainee did the same, and we were lucky enough to have the company of a third person who has already completed training and recently begun teaching. So the other trainee and I took turns guiding each other through the first few minutes of a basic sequence and then trading critiques, and we were immensely aided by the observations and insights of our more experienced peer.
I guess I’m officially a yoga dork, because I sincerely enjoyed discussing the details of each posture and how to teach them. I can’t remember the last time I felt so fulfilled from studying! Considering I took a full class before the dialogue practice I’d expect to be exhausted after three hours of yoga, but in fact I feel light and elated. Turns out, my body, when given the chance to properly enjoy it, LOVES vinyasa yoga!
With just three of us in a quiet room I felt free to explore my movements and soak in the feeling of every shift of my body. And thanks to a very useful adjustment, I now know what it feels like to have a flat back–and this in a posture I’d never questioned. That is to say, I had no idea my back was arched in half lift, but apparently it was, and now I know how to get an amazing stretch from the crown of my head straight to the tip of my tailbone, deliciously elongating my spine.
My body is so happy with me, so grateful I have found a way to move in gentle ways that make it strong. It feels GOOD to be strong, just as it feels good to identify my weaknesses and allow them to exist, as opposed to pushing past them.
Sometimes I will sink to my knees during push-up plank and that is fine, it is not even less than, it is a full expression of the posture. Whatever I do in any given moment is simply enough, provided I am honoring my breath. What a relief, to be enough at all times! And that feeling of contentment travels way beyond the mat, so I’m especially glad to have found it tonight.
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